Old Enough to Know Better

In 8.5 hours I will officially be old enough to know better. But as an acquaintance told me, I don't look a day over 21, so if anyone asks, tomorrow is my 21st birthday. Actually, I grew up around women who never concealed/altered/or really showed much interest in their age other than it being a mere number. I think I will likewise follow suit. (However, I see no reason for full disclosure unless asked first.)

Anyway, the sad part about celebrating this milestone is that it's quite anti-climatic. I mean really, what kind of party can you expect when the party of the century was thrown a mere 10 days earlier. Graduating from law school and sharing the immense joy and relief that goes with it eclipses and trumps a birthday by far. To paraphrase Seinfeld: all I did was not die for another year. (Shout out to God for keeping me alive and such).

I think it may be time to implement my five year plan, however. I'm finished with school, so I officially plan to start having a big-girl life. I have no idea what that entails, however. I imagine I should figure that out in the next few hours, but I've perfected the art of procrastination. Why should I waste that talent?

I would like to tentatively put on the 5 year plan an attempt @finding a man that doesn't irritate me; and hopefully one that I can tolerate long enough to actually date for a significant amount of time. I'd rather not be dateless at the inevitable barrage of weddings that are soon to come. I expect at least 2 wedding invitations in the coming year. And my older friends tell me it only gets worse from there. Arrgh. Although, that does mean wedding cake. Mmmmm wedding cake.

I once heard about a wedding that didn't have cake. They had pie instead. TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE! And I once went to a wedding where the daughters from the previous marriage had made the cake. EQUALLY UNACCPETABLE! Hear ye, hear ye: An official island proclamation. If you're inviting me to a wedding, there'd better be cake. Store-bought cake people. What kind of mickey mouse operations are you inviting me to? And for the record, I'm fine with grocery store cake. In fact, I heart grocery store cake greatly. But do not, do NOT, attempt to pass off Betty Crocker or a kringle or freakin' blueberry pie as an appropriate nuptial dessert. A violation of this proclamation will result in a supremely hideous and/or cheap gift. FYI. Write that down.

Psuedodate

Remember aforementioned guy, who asked me out, who was meant to be mere entertainment for a little while. Well, he is far more confusing than entertaining. I have had a total of 2 pseudodates with this guy (hence where he obtained his nickname) and 0 actual dates. Let me explain...

Our first meeting was at a coffee shop, where he and I agreed to meet so he could give me the tickets to the party he was throwing. So, we met up, stayed and chatted for about an hour, etc. But this isn't technically a date right? Even though he did invite me to lunch with friends he was meeting up with. But still not a real date.

Second meeting occurs after he completely flaked on the graduation party AND a promise to call me the very next day. (I ended up busting him at a bar, and it was especially hysterical because he actually kept cursing himself for forgetting.) Anyway, so second meeting actually started out as a date. He invited me to his place to cook me dinner. When I call to ask for directions, he informs me that he invited another friend over too. Turning an actual date into a pseudodate.

On top of it all, he's actually not all that exciting. Speaks very highly of himself and is young. So young that he's got a Bacardi banner in his apt. (Eye roll). I was condescending when I pointed it out, I realize. But still, why do you have a Bacardi banner in your apt? Or a flag of a pot leaf in your bedroom while I"m at it. Yargh. I think I may be rid of this guy before June.

Was I thinking at all?!?

It rained for about 3 weeks straight here. Ok, I'm exaggerating, but there was at least 5 straight days of rain. And that got me to thinking: at what point during 2nd semester did I have a personality transplant? On what planet did I think it was a good idea for me to move to Seattle? Granted, I only gave it a hot minute's worth of thought, but still. It really didn't deserve that much consideration! Seriously! I HATE RAIN! And it rains 2 out of 3 days in Seattle. Therefore, under no circumstances should I live there. Get outta here! Yeesh.

This certainly isn't the first time I've had a "what was I thinking?" moment. But honestly, this may be the most extreme case I've ever had. Clearly the stress of law school and graduation was getting to me. But, I'm happy to report that I have had a return of my senses. (Thank goodness).

Now, where was I...

Ah yes. Graduation. The sister I never wanted, but never knew I needed drove up from IA to be my mom's official photographer and get inducted into the biological family. She arrived on Thurs night, and the shenanignans began even earlier than anticipated:

We went to get sushi mere minutes after her arrival. However, shortly after arrival, we witnessed an attempted burglary. (Not to be confused with a robbery, which involves weapons). Ok, so we didn't actually witness the attempted theft. All we saw was a slight scuffle, with a guy yelling "you owe me a refund!". Followed by one of the cooks putting him in a sleeper hold. We were huddled in a 2 inch corner, trying to avoid becoming collateral damage. In the end, nothing was actually damaged, the resto got the money back, and the guy waited calmly until the police came to arrest him. He even politely let us pass when we needed to get out of our corner. It was a very strange experience.

Ok, after that, things went smoothly. We had good times at the graduation and the dinner. Followed by a sweet night at Mondays on Saturday night. Saturday night actually started out fairly slow, but then the Blue Steel bartenders kept feeding us free shots. Three shots in 30 minutes makes for a night of drunk dials and taking pictures with random people.

All in all, a darn good time!

Lots of Changes

Well, stuff has actually been happening lately. Namely, I graduated baby! The ceremony was nice, all though some of the speeches made me do a head tilt. I was, however, distracted for most of the time because I was busy worrying about where I'd last had my right earring. Now, losing an earring is not normally a traumatic experience, except I'd worn these for precisely 2 hours and 3 minutes. However, they were eventually found -- in the backseat of my car of all places. I suspect it fell out of my ear and into my car when I had to run back and grab my wayward tassle. Anyway, the panic subsided shortly after finding the earring. And so I was able to shake my groove thang calmly at the graduation party.

.

Ok, I hafta go get ready for my date. To be continued....

eeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh my goodness! It's finally hit me, in a good way. I'm graduating on Friday. FRIDAY! Do you know when Friday is? It's 4 days from today. It's the end of THIS WEEK! EEEEEEEEEEE!

Night Out

So last night, I amused myself by going out to The Climax -- a party hosted by the gentlemen of Alpha Phi Alpha. I must say it was generally enjoyable. Although, there was an incident.

So, I go to the dance floor with another girl to get our groove on. As we're out there, she's approached by a guy that she knows. She proceeds to introduce us. Anyway, he's talking some trash about how we thundercats don't know about it. Apparently he's older than your average undergrad. So, to prove that I know all about the dance, I proceed to show my prowess on the dance floor...and then get left by the girl that introduced us. Which was ok, not like she left the building or anything.

Anyway, we're dancing. And "Check Up On It" comes on, and I am all kinds of excited. As I shake my groove thing, he not-at-all discreetly examines my groove thing. Complete with commentary "aww, let me see it, let me take a look." To be fair, I was being obnoxious about imitating the dance in the video, and so I found his comment less insulting and more funny. Then we continue to dance, and OH MY GOODNESS is he really attempting to touch my, oh no wait, he's just tall and didn't realize that he nearly touched my. Ok, I"ll just put my hands in my pockets to keep him from getting confused, OH MY GOODNESS you simply canNOT make that same mistake twice. Who does he think he is? Is there a sign up that requests gratuitous groping of my puhbic area? And why aren't you as smart as Pavlov's dogs, you keep reaching even though you keep getting blocked you not-so-sly like the jungle cat sexual harasser. Oh thank goodness, here comes some guy that wants to talk to him, I see my escape. Oh crap, he caught me. "I need to go check on my girl, I'll be right back" (In a pig's eye I will).

Then it's the end of the night, and do you know he asked for my phone so he could put his number in it? (After more gratuitous and all around sleazy touching -- this time limited to my midsection). Yeah. Right. Sure. I'll "scream" at you alright. Uh huh. riiiiiiiiiight. Wonder if he's holding his breath?

Frangelico

If I may rip off an advertisement: Fate is what happens when the unexpected becomes pleasurable. I had a weekend of fate this past weekend.

The last few days have been filled with unexpected pleasures. On Friday, I went out with a couple girls for a night on the town. What started out as a slow night at a restaurant-cum-bar-at-night ended up being a flirty night at a day of the week bar. The second bar is known for serving super-strong drinks cheaply. It is also a bar that I often end up being wingwoman extraordinare for my friends. On this particular night out, my friend said she wanted to see me approach a guy. (I'm not entirely sure why, but whatever). Apparently, my previous wingwoman-ing doesn't count as approaching.

While we were standing about, drinking and people watching, we were approached by a rather persistent guy. Looks-wise, he could probably get an honorable mention, but was nothing to write home about. He was very talkative, however. He also gets the persistence award for tracking down my email address and asking me about my friend as a follow-up from Friday. While I was slightly creeped out (until I figured out he was also a student), I was impressed with his tenacity. He also had a friend, who shared a name with Superfly from two years ago. He also had an uncanny resemblance to Superfly. But for the fact that he was living in Madison and hadn't yet gone to grad school, I would have thought it was him. That was pretty eerie.

At the end of the night, I did end up approaching a guy. I use the term "approaching" loosely. He was walking past and I made a smart-alecky comment. He must have been vaguely amused, because he made an appointment to continue our conversation post-bar run. Sadly, I was summoned to leave by my ride before he returned. I was kind enough to tell him that I was leaving, however, walking the 20 feet to the bar to say goodbye. Get this, I got a fundraising party invite for Thursday AND he asked for my phone number. Then he USED the phone number the very next day. Craziness! I haven't made the call as to where I stand with him. The conversation was fairly clever, but I haven't yet decided whether he can keep up with my sarcasm. Either way, I've got to shake him by the end of July, because I will be leaving, and I am in not in the market for a long-distance relationship with someone I just met....I tried that once, and it wasn't to great results. Incidentally, he has a faint resemblance to that very person I made that attempt with. Ha. Fate must be chuckling in amusement.

Joke of the Day, thanks to Mack the Knife

George Bush goes to a primary school to talk about the war. After his talk he offers question time.One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him what his name is. "Billy." "And what is your question, Billy?" "I have 3 questions. First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? And third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden?" Just then the bell rings for recess.George Bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess. When they resume George says, "OK, where were we? Oh that's right question time. Who has a question?"Another little boy puts up his hand. George points him out and asks him what his name is. "Steve""And what is your question, Steve?" "I have 5 questions. First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden? Fourth, why did the recess bell go 20 minutes early? And fifth, what the ---- happened to Billy?

Taking the Day off

Today is my first official day as a Law School Pre-Graduate. Yesterday was my last day as a law student. In an honorable twist, I gave a presentation for my last class, and managed to turn it into a class party. It was really quite exciting. Then, I went to the Terrace with some small group members, followed by dinner at a local Japanese restaurant. It was really nice to end the saga with the same people I started with.

So, this is what it feels like to be nearly done. I gotta admit, on one level, it is great. On another level, I'm a touch anxious. Graduation just leaves me closer to studying for the bar. And being this close to graduation and jobless means some serious upcoming anxiety. Couple that with the lack of love life (although preferable to figuring out post-move relationship it's still kinda sad not to have that someone to whine to) and the constant search for a great dress for graduation, and it's not so great. But, I vastly prefer this negated greatness to the thought of another year in school.

All in all, I think I deserve to take this sunny day off to bask in my limbo.

Gym Etiquette

When is it appropriate to dislodge a wedgie while at the gym? All this pumping iron and elliptical training is causing some serious creepage of my undies. Is it ok to dislodge said undies from my rear end while I am between sets? How about if I am on the elliptical trainer or the recumbent bike? No? Sad.

Usually, the only harm in picking one's arse is the risk of a potential hottie being grossed out. But, is this really a problem in the gym? I've noticed that men aren't so susceptible to flirting when they are mid-rep. So, what's the harm in a little undie shifting?

Ok, ok. There's always a risk. I guess that's life lesson of the day: When working out, always wear a thong.

Platonic Shifts

See what I did there? That was a play on words. I do not, in fact, want to discuss tectonic plates (ooooh, look at the middle school geology being put to use. Boy do I feel educated).

Instead, this is a commentary on my decision to stop with the category shifting. I don't know why I tend to fall into this so much, but I have (guy) friends, who then become more than friends, possibly boyfriends, then back to friends. Or even boyfriends that turn to ex's that turn to sorta friends and back to ex's. Really, these situations can go no where but bad. I cannot be the only person that suffers from this though. So the real question is, why does it happen? I have a few theories:

1. We are too lazy to invest the time and emotion into finding a new person to relate to.
2. We really aren't very good people and no one else wants to be our friend.
3. We are attempting to (re)kindle a relationship that was doomed from the beginning.
3.(a). We are attempting this (re)kindling because there is some sort of spark there, but the spark never catches fire.
4. I ADORE that commercial with the breakdancing worm by Visa. Not really a theory, but it was just on, and I got distracted.
5. We really don't have anything better to do with our time but get into the messiest relationship we can find.

So what can we learn from platonic shifts? Obviously we can't learn to do better, otherwise we would. And learning from our mistakes isn't working either. Therefore, I think we can just use it as an exercise in going with the flow and enjoying the good times while they last. I, of course, suck at that game. This may be why I keep shifting. *Note to self, learn lesson the first (or second, third, or fifth) time.

A public service announcement

This is just a note, to women everywhere.

1. A man is never going to chase you in his motorcycle, looking in every taxi until he finds you.
(How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days)

2. A man is never going to take you jetskiing on the Hudson River, take you to Staten Island, and show you your relative's signature....particularly if you're a descendant of slaves.
(Hitch)

3. A man is never going to write a book about you.
(The Best Man)

4. A man is never going to ride up on his horse in Central Park as you idiotically run into a stationary object, such as a lampost.
(Will & Grace)

5. A man is never going to rescue you from a tower that you're trapped in, which is guarded by a fire-breathing dragon...particularly if you are expecting reptile balloons afterwards.
(Shrek)

6. You will not have deja vu when you meet your next date, you have not seen him before, once upon a dream.
(Sleeping Beauty)

7. A man is not going to steal a priceless painting from a musuem just because you said you liked it on your first date.
(Thomas Crown Affair)

8. A man is not going to write a musical for you, as a guise for convincing the producer to fund the stage project.
(Moulin Rouge)

9. You will not get a date with the President of the United States just because you insulted him when you thought he wasn't in the room.
(The American President)
9.a. You may get a date with a guy who likes bossy women with this tactic, however. Of course, then you'd be stuck with a pushover.

10. A man is not going to fly to Paris to find you, while you're there at the behest of another man.
(Sex and the City)

11. Your prince is not coming. Not today, not tomorrow, not someday. Get over it and start looking for Mr. Right Now, Mr. Until Further Notice, and/or Mr. Space Holder.
(Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs).

There, now I've dispelled common movie myths. But, in spite of my cynicism (particularly re: true love and soul mates and all that), you should be aware that good fiction is based on reality....maybe there's hope after all.

Report on things

Things that have been said to me:
"But for that sweet sweet bod, we'd all think you were a dude."
"Nice legs, didn't know you had any."
Thanks? I think...

Things that are gross:
1. Finding a hair in your Arapaho Wrap
2. Finding a bug in your Hot Turtle
Incidentally, these are also things that happened to me in the last 7 days.

Things that are adventurous:
1. Riding your scooter with only 1 contact on.
2. Riding your scooter without your helmet.
Incidentally, these are also Things that I found out were adventurous this week.

Things that make me sad:
1. There's a kid that was quoted as saying "marriage is for white people."
2. There are tens of thousands more black men in prison than in college.
:(

Things that make me angry:
1. Gas is $2.79.
2. I spent $30+ filling up my gas tank.
Grr!!!

From the Mailbag

Dear Ambitious Brain,

I'm not sure what made you think that taking more than a few weeks off from the gym was a good idea. I'm not sure what made you think that suddenly deciding to go without consulting me first was a good idea. I am writing this letter to tell you that both were horrendous ideas.

I have quite enjoyed my time lounging on the couch, just as you have enjoyed watching cable. I didn't think it was the best use of my time, but I got kind of used to it. Your lack of planning does not, however, consititute an emergency on my part. Yes, you have suddenly decided that working out for lengthy periods of time is a good idea. Well screw you, my friend, I ain't in the mood. If you insist on continuing in this course of action, you will be punished. Enjoy not being able to walk, sucker.

Very truly yours,
Your Body

Well dang, what can I say to that but ouch?

An Endorsement

I have always said, that the rich are silly people...unless they grew up with moderate to low income first. Although that isn't always a guarantee either. ANYWAY...My new guilty pleasure is "The Real Housewives of Orange County." All this show does is prove just how silly the rich are. Some examples:
1. One of the women is putting "CZs" (that's cubic zirconias to you laypersons) in the rims of her truck. The rims which are already hot pink. The CZs are 100+ carats. Really? Can't you find something better to do with your money?
2. There is a guy who's name is Slade. He called his wife dumb and implied it was because she was from Peru. Hmmm. Your name is Slade and you stalked a potential customer while he was with his family at the local Equestrian Center. And your wife is dumb?
3. One of the women says she's going to stay 32 forever. Seriously, grow up. You're going to get old, get over yourself.

Idiots! FYI people, Common Sense is for rich people too. :)

My Irish Whiskey named friend

An away message that is funny to me -- even though they don't explain where my friend is...


"Sometimes I want to clean up my desk and go out and say, respect me, I'm a respectable grown-up, and other times I just want to jump into a paper bag and shake and bake myself to death."

Soooo true.

Nightly Observations

So, last night I went to Flip Night. It was a good time. For those of you that don't know, Flip Night is a drink special at State Street Brats (a registered historical landmark, incidentally). Basically, after you order your drink, if you call the coin toss you get 75% off your drink. Happens every Tuesday night.

Anyway, last night, we went to Flip Night in celebration of black/brown appreciation day. LEO students are taking over the school, and it's very very hot. Brats has even put in a dance floor, and that was very exciting. Here are some things that I observed while having good times @Flip Night:

Pick Up Lines that are Effective (or at least amusing):
1. "What is your name?" "pheebee." "Marry me, pheebee!"
2. "Is it ok that I'm young? I mean, I am graduating."

Pick Up Lines that are NOT Effective (or amusing):
1. "Don't start nothing, won't be nothing" "Hey, I'm not the one who's going to get in trouble." (Said while pointing out a wedding ring). "Well, I'm not from here." Oh of course! Why didn't I think of that. Marriage only counts in your hometown. C'mon!
2. "You're from the M-Dot? Oh, that's the same thing as Madtown." Right, because being 3x bigger isn't going to make a difference. C'mon!!

City Snob

It took 4 years in IA for me to discover that I am a city girl....or a city snob as some people like to call me. Every once in a while, I need a reminder of why I need to stay far far away from rural areas -- and let me just clarify, rural areas also include suburbia as defined by people in the Chicago metro area.

Today, I was driving about, minding my own business, and I found myself trapped in surburbia. Ok, I wasn't trapped, I was passing through. However, I was in a place whose name began "Village of...". Ugh. It was positively claustrophobic. I even experienced a pretty severe case of road rage. (Why do people in rural areas insist on driving under the speed limit?). There were rolling hills, and fields, and "Main Street." Literally! Main Street was the main street in town. I admit that it was picturesque. But I couldn't wait to see a decent high rise and/or people who would drive the speed limit on a clear sunny day.

The moral of the story, I will not be moving to a place smaller than Milwaukee.

Daily Observations

1. My local bagel shop is now charging 30 cents for bagels rather than 25 cents. In the three years that I've been here, the price has raised by 5 cents. This is definitely an accelerated rate of inflation, but I appreciate the 5 cent increments. Perhaps the person in charge of setting prices for bagels should take over the pricing of stamps. I'm positive the nickel raise did not shock the market the way the post office seemes to believe it will.

2. You should not get engaged unless it is followed by a marriage. My aforementioned ex-fiance and my mother still talk on a semi-regular basis. Why?

3. Lawyers write on legal pads. I hate legal pads. I hate the way the paper flips vertically rather than horizontally. I hate the way you can't save the pages in notebook fashion. I hate that it's such a waste of paper since you can only write on one side of the paper unless you rip it off the pad. Therefore, I cannot be a lawyer.

4. Mothers drive their children insane. I realize this, but my mother is being particularly pronounced. Why wasn't I born an orphan.
4.a. I realized being abandoned as a child is not preferable to having 2 perfectly loving parents. It's the lack of nagging that I'm after.

5. I should never have oodles of time on my hands when I have a project looming. This is the first day of a full week off, and so far the only quasi-productive thing I've done is start my laundry. Notice how I haven't yet started my paper that's due at the end of the semester.

6. An uncanny knack for memorizing phone numbers may lead to trouble after drinking. D'ah well, stuff happens.

7. My resolve to stop swearing as much has been fairly successful. I realize it wasn't in the true spirit of Lent, but I don't remember Lent being a big deal @my church when I was young, and I think the result of my resolution is quite christian-like. In the end, I'll be a (smidgen) better person for it.

8. I have read 2 books that began as blogs. I don't think this is what commentators meant when they said there would be a blog explosion...but I appreciate the broad additions to chick-lit. :)

Discretionary Award

I would like to present myself with the Shopper's Excellence Award of the Month. I found a fantastic dress to match these shoes. ($56 (on clearance, down from $330!!))

On Employee Shopping Day, I found earrings and a bracelet to match the shoes and dress. ($15)

Then, last night, 3 hours before arrival time, I managed to find a small purse to match the shoes, dress, earrings, and bracelet. ($8)

The joy of feeling pretty and taking pretty pictures....priceless.

Query

Here's my question:
Why must I justify my reasons and rationalizations for things I want to do? I want to do them because I WANT to. If I want to live in Timbuktu, then I want to live there because I WANT to. I don't have a husband. I have no kids. What I choose to do doesn't directly affect anyone but me. Now, there may be all kinds of indirect effects, and I fully acknowledge that. But does your random indirect effect really give you the right to question my reasons? Or, even demand to know them? I didn't think so. Now get off my back!

Alright, so I'm still generally bitter. That's my perogative too isn't it? It's not actual actions but my mood that seems to trouble others. Well, please note the aforementioned proclamation about departing from my island. Sincerely, the Management.

More specifically...

You Know You're From Milwaukee When...

You've been to the Rep and could smell beer, brats, and kraut. You drive around with little Green Bay Packers flags on your car. You and your friends spend all day Sunday drinking at the bar, bashing the Cubs. You don't know that Schlitz, Blatz, and Pabst aren't brewed in Milwaukee anymore You know people who have tied dead animals to the hoods of their cars. You know what a "Supper Club" is. You've eaten beer, brats, and kraut for breakfast. You think "The Safe House" is better than Disneyworld. You won't let a car from out of state go faster than you. You call Air Force Ones Dookies No matter where you go you see the Jesus Car - and can't understand what's coming out the speakers You cruised Hwy 100 or Sherman Ave To you, Martin Luther King Drive is still 3rd St. and Cesar Chavez Drive is still 16th St You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Milwaukee.

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You know you're from WI if...

You Know You're From Wisconsin When...

You can taste a difference in cheese made somewhere else You own at least one tie with a or peice of jewelry with a Green Bay Packer theme You can find and pronounce : Eau Claire, Oconomowoc, Menomonee Falls, Waukesha, and La Crosse, Fond du Lac. You can correctly spell Milwaukee. You know what "bubbler" means. At least one of your family members works / worked in a cheese factory. A holstein cow outside of Wisconsin makes you miss home. You can taste the difference between apples grown up north and the ones that you can buy in the south. When talking about the Green Bay Packers you refer to them as "we". When the weather hits 0 degrees you decide that maybe it's time to get out a jacket instead of a sweatshirt. The family gets together every week for fish fry at the local pub. You know what a brat is, and they're at every outdoor event that your family has ever had. You know how to make a very good sled out of normal household items. Your love you outdoor pool because of how it doubles as an ice skating area during the winter. You can tell the difference between the smell of cow manure and pig manure. You have watched Fargo and not noticed an accent. You drive around with the air conditioning on until it hits 30 degrees, because it just was so darn hot outside. The local paper needs 6 pages to cover the Packers... in July! Your best shirt has a big letter G on it. You've said "Of course they'll win. They're God's team." You think it's nice enough to swim when the temperature hits 50. You family owns a "winter car" while the "good one" sits in the garage from Nov-Apr. Your put ketchup on a charcoal grilled NY strip steak. You live in a house that has no front steps, yet the door is one yard above the ground. You think everyone from south of Madison has an accent. You can identify a Michigan accent. Down South to you means Chicago. Traveling coast to coast means going from Superior to Milwaukee. You can make sense out of the words "upnort" and "Trivers". You have to go to Florida to get a tan in August. You consider Madison exotic. You can visit Luxemburg, Holland, Belgium, Denmark, Berlin, New London & Poland all in one afternoon. You can recognize someone from Illinois from their driving. You buy cat litter every winter, but you don't own a cat. At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant or cannery. You know what to do with a Blatz. You don't have a coughing fit from one sip of Pabst Blue Ribbon. Bucky the Badger hangs on your Christmas tree even if you didn't go to University of Wisconsinm Madison. You're a member of the Polar Bear Club and proud of it. You can use the word "ya der hey" easily in a sentence You hear someone use the words "uff-dah" and you don't immediately break into uncontrollable laughter. Your whole family wears green and gold to church on Sunday. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a cow next to your blue spruce. You know how to polka You own a cheesehead You have cow pharaphenilia around your house, including your pajama pants You know what a FIB is and can spot them a mile away. You think of the major four food groups as cheese, beer, brats and Jell-O salad with marshmallows. FFA was the most popular club in high school You have eaten a cow pie at the State Fair. There was at least one kid in your class who had to help milk cows in the morning Country Kitchen is the place to meet after the party You have ever seen or played in a "broom ball" game. You have ever partied at Summerfest, Festa Italiana, German Fest, Irish Fest, Oktoberfest, or all of the above. You or someone you know was a "Dairy Princess" at a county fair. You can't be friends with a Vikings fan Your idea of diversity is having black, white, and brown cows. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Wisconsin.

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Shopping High

Retail therapy works. Seriously. I've been on the greatest shopping high ever since last night. I went out around 715 last nite, headed to Target. By the time I got home, I'd been to 6 stores, and found 3 great buys. Plus I fufilled 2 much-needed necessities.

Included in the list of great buys, is my dress for Barrister's Ball. It matches the aforementioned bronze shoes to a "T" (There's a ha-ha there, because the shoes are T-straps). The dress is actually floor length, even though I thought I was looking for a cocktail length. It's brown and gold and all-around fabulous. Basically, it's so cute I might need to take a date...Of course, I haven't the slightest idea who that date might be or where in the world I might find him, but what're you gonna do? This high is so great, I don't even care to deal with those details. Well I do, but just not right now. :)

Travel bug itis

My friend from Tosa is currently flying to Japan. Isn't that nuts and/or crazy! First, I knew only Canadians that had been to Japan. Then, just like that, me and a bunch of my friends are all over Asia. Incidentally, she went to Japan with another h.s. friend that was going to visit a guy that she was sort of seeing (vaguely familiar story, but more than slightly more drastic). How romantic and adventurous!

And I have a bunch of friends living or visiting London. More craziness ensues. I feel so vicariously cosmopolitan. :)

A Proclamation

Here ye, hear yea...Effective immediately:

Everyone is hereby put on probation on MY island until a time as yet to be determined. All visitors and permanent residents are instructed to move promptly to the outskirts of the island. Visitors passes will be granted whenever I see fit. General greetings will still be accepted from non-visitors, however, I suggest you keep witty banter to a minimum. While it may be found entertaining, it may also be found irritating (are you feeling lucky?).

While this particular course of action may be...ahem...extreme. I am particularly cranky, and everyone is bothering me. Furthermore, I am tired of people who keep reminding me that I am awfully cranky. Since I am the only constant in this equation, I have decided to stop dealing with everyone. Thank you for your cooperation.

I am soooooooo addicted!

You Are Emerald Green

Deep and mysterious, it often seems like no one truly gets you. Inside, you are very emotional and moody - though you don't let it show. People usually have a strong reaction to you... profound love or deep hate. But you can even get those who hate you to come around. There's something naturally harmonious about you.

What Color Green Are You?

Sex and the City (Again)

I am currently watching Sex and the City on TBS. And while it's quite censored, I still enjoy it far more than paying for the 6 season set. As per usual, I am amazed at how accurate this show is. And, as I watched Harry Goldenblatt speak really bad French (Charlotte's 2nd husband for those of you who are unaware), I contemplated the topic of the day. Basically, the topic of the show was the lack of romance in modern relationships.

So Carrie is finding herself disconcerted by all the grand romantic gestures that Barishnykov (yes, the ballet dancer -- again for those of you unaware). At the end of the show, she says "I'm an American, you gotta take it down a notch." This is hysterical for several reasons. First, they end up at McDonalds in full opera gear. Second, I completely agree that gigantic gestures of romance are a little much. What would you do if your significant otehr randomly began reading you poetry as you sit together on the couch? Barring literature majors and natural poetry lovers, I think it'd be cause for raising an eyebrow.

Of course, this means that men really have it easy these days. So frankly, my friends of the male persuasion, suck it up! All a girl wants is something sweet (chocolate), unexpected (flowers), or just thoughtful (card or kind word). For heavens sake, we aren't asking for the "A" game! Strap on the lyre, whip out your song card, and stop at the frickin' grocery store and pick up some flowers. Or, if you're too lazy for that, hop on virtualflorist.com or bluemountaincards.com and send her a cutsie email. Geez!

p.s. if I were a guy, I'd be such a pimp. I wouldn't need this advice at all!

Uncanny....not cool a random quiz has got me pegged!

Your Love Life Secrets Are

Looking back on your life, you will have many true loves. You're a little scarred from your past relationships, but who isn't? It's important to you that your lover is very attractive. You like to have someone to show off. In fights, you love to debate and defend yourself. You logic prevails - or at least you'd like to think so. Break-ups can be painful for you, but you never show it. You hold your head high.

Your Love Life Secrets, Revealed

Excuse me while I copy my Flamingo Friend...

You Are Sunshine

Soothing and calm You are often held up by others as the ideal But too much of you, and they'll get burned You are best known for: your warmth Your dominant state: connecting

What Type of Weather Are You?

Emotional Eating

I have never been big on emotional eating (especially eating ice cream!). But lately, I've been eating like it's going out of style. I cannot stop munching, eating full meals for no reason, and generally feeding my face. I've even overcome my usual obstacle of being fare too lazy to go and get whatever I'm craving. I fear that I will become a 490 lb woman in short order. Especially since in addition to eating a million times a day, I've become adamantly opposed to going to the gym. I've only been once since the day after Valentine's Day. Quick! Someone find the cure to reverse this awful habit!

Barrister's Ball

The goal for this, my last Barrister's Ball, is to find a fierce dress to match bronze shoes with amber stone detailing. And a date would be nice, but not necessary. If I do get a date, I want it to be a real date, not a pretend date. I'm not all about the pretend-dating. So, get on that. Ready go!

Accurate quotation

Every black person in America is bilingual. We speak street vernacular and job interview....
~~Dave Chappelle

Ha!

It takes so much...

So, I've been saying (for at least 3 years) that law school takes a lot out of you. Emotionally, mentally, sometimes physically, it just drains you. And it does a pretty good job of killing off certain parts of you. Now, these parts may vary, depending on what type of person you are, and what kinds of classes you take -- but inevitably some part of you that existed before law school will cease to exist within the 3 years this journey takes.

That being said, I'm generally bemoaning this fact when I'm whining about something. However, I am happy to report that a psychologist actually did a study, and has determined that law school makes people risk averse. I read this in a book. Thanks to the Socratic method, the generally competitive atmosphere, and the fact that the lower part of the class has never been in that position before makes us extremely opposed to risks. So there! I am not making it up. pbbth.

Alert level intense red-orange

And so, I've decided to recommence the job search. Ok, to be fair, I've never actually stopped it, but I've decided to kick it up a notch. At any rate, I am applying some new tactics. Here's the real question: some books suggest expanding your options to your next choices of city. I've already got my top 3. I have no idea what to make my top 4-6. I mean really, could I actually live in Indiana/Kansas/Texas and not kill someone (myself included)? I didn't think I could either. So where are numbers 4 through 6?

Feeling artsy at the Pike Place Market. (Which really just looked like the expo center at the State Fair, but who asked me?)
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City views....
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A pretty little view from the top of the Needle
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Oh yeah, I owe you pictures. Here's my ride from Madison to Midway. I was on said luxury bus all by myself. Ahh, how does the other half live?
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Stuck

Inspiration from Sex and the City

This was the post-it episode. A running theme of the show was whether everything happens for a reason, even if you don't know it yet. And furthermore, if everything happens for a reason, what is the lesson learned from a relationship that is ending.

That got me to thinking (oh, that line was sooooo Carrie Bradshaw wasn't it?!), what have I learned from my past relationships? I mean, my first love, obviously I learned something from that. And the second relationship, pretty clear what I learned from that (propensity for children, yay or nay). However, can we really say I learned anything from everyone's favorite relationship that was shorter than the break-up? Or how about the guy affectionately known as the Vinster? And what about the random non-relationships in between? Ok seriously, is there really something to be learned?

I have my doubts. But if a gun was to my head, I'd have a few thoughts. First, why is someone holding a gun to my head trying to figure out what I learned from past relationships? and Second, I think all I learned is that I am a very obsessive person. Oh, and that I really want a pretty pretty diamond for my engagement ring. Multiple carats, perhaps. :}

Spring Break

I need somewhere cheap to go to for Spring Break. Any suggestions/invitations?!!

Kiss &Tango

Well, there was no kissing on the dance floor, nor was there any tango, but I definitely went out salsa dancing in a great big ballroom. It was fabulous. In the book, Kiss & Tango, the author calls the whole operation a milonga. Basically, it's where men who can dance the tango (or in my case, the salsa) go and women who love to be spun and dipped go to combine their interests. I must say, life was fantastic and fabulous that night. Although the engineer was a novice, he wasn't my only option. After making a concerted effort to dispel the notion that we were betrothed, several men asked me to dance. Some of them were more intense than others, but I quickly remembered what I learned in Mexico -- my one job was to be pliable and to follow. It was absolutely fantastic...I remembered just how much I love dancing.

In related news, the engineer claims that he will be starting lessons shortly AND will be quite good by the time I see him again. My reaction to this was a question "Does that mean it will be a really long time before I see you again, or that you're a really quick learner?". He said it meant that he's a really quick learner -- we'll see how that goes.

For the record, as of right now, I'm avoiding the question of where I'll be next year.

Guess where I was for a week?!
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Untitled

I couldn't come up with a witty title, but news will be forthcoming...I just don't want to ruin the surprise. Here's a hint though. :)

Risk Averse

I've made the executive decision not to go through with my application to teach English in France. I just don't see how I can afford to do so. First, I'd have to pay a $35 application fee, then I'd have to figure out a way to make my car payment from France.

I suppose, secretly, I just don't want to teach anything to anyone. I suppose, additionally, tthat I don't want to go another year of living like a poor student.

Ok, maybe I'm just risk averse. Something I just never had to come to grips with before. Ugh. How boring am I?

Jealous: adj. Having to do with feelings of envy

Have you ever noticed that when your friend (or anyone) gets a new signficant other or a crush, that's all they can think of? And while you don't begrudge them their new relationship, you really don't want to hear another thing about it?

Ok, that's not always true. To be fair, we all have moments and habits of vicarious living. But, sometimes when you're out on the hunt, and you've turned cynical, it's all you can do to keep from declaring permanent single status and giving up on finding your own.

Now I ask you, is this jealousy? Are you envious of that person's significant other? Probably not, unless you had your own crush on the same person. No, maybe you aren't jealous. Maybe you're just wishing you could find your own -- and the expression of that wish turns your eyes green ;).

I know, I know. I should stop posting things that I think about in the shower.

First of Many

Last night we had a surprise party for my friend from the OC. It was great for many many reasons, but it started out particularly funny because she couldn't get her door open. That was very very funny.

After having several (and by several, I mean several) cocktails we headed to a bar where another law student was dj-ing. There were many many law students (of color) there along with lots of other people with some color in their skin. It was almost like being at a real dance club.

The beginning of the end

School began today. I have officially began the final semester of this journey. I'd like to say I've been reflecting on my years in school and all that I've learned; but I've done no such thing. Instead, I am just so done with it all. I'm done with grades, I'm done with the pressure, I'm done with exams. Instead, I've concerned myself with setting myself up for the next phase. Where do I want to live for the next substantial portion of my life? Washington, D.C.? Chicago, IL? Elsewhere? An engineer that I know of asked me where all I was looking. Well, D.C. and Chicago. Then I explained that I couldn't just pick up and go anywhere, because I have to be certified there. But more than one person has asked me why can't I just go wherever? And I suppose this is a very valid point. I haven't taken the IL Bar yet (as my younger cousin very aptly pointed out). I could very well take the bar in NV, MD, GA, hell I could take it for North Dakota (it'll be a cold day). So, where do I want to live? Frankly, I have no idea. I had no idea when I was applying to law school (I applied to a school in Philadelphia, Los Angeles, northern California, Boston, others) but I ended up in WI because law school is expensive and they bribed me; thereby making the decision for me. Thus, the moral of the story is, I want to go wherever they will pay me to go and wherever I will be ecstatic to be living. Suggestions? Ideas? Job offers?

Watch Service

So, our New Year's Eve turned out to be a mini-adventure. The plan was to go watch the Peach Drop downtown (by the Underground!) and then meet up with the ATL engineer's friends and go do something. In order to make it to the Peach Drop, we had to leave the apartment about 15 minutes after he told me the plan to drive to the MARTA (subway) station and then walk to the square. We actually make it out of the house in 15 minutes (despite the change in outfits -- as I'd been planning on going to a club). We walked (briskly) to the MARTA station; and got there just in time to hear the subway leaving. We waited for the next one, along with a ton of other people trying to do the same thing. (This is a picture of us after we missed the train :P)

Now, what's funny is once on the train car, it was very crowded, of course. A guy who was clearly very intoxicated decided to start up a sing-a-long. At first, he sang Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. No one joined in, however. Then he switched to gospel, starting with "This Little Light of Mine" and followed by "Glory, Glory". Oh, everyone in the train car joined in. In the midst of my giggles, I turned to the engineer and thanked him for taking me to Watch Service before heading out for the night. All in all, it made for a darn good story.

Oh...and we did make it in time to see the countdown -- ahem, and people drinking Grey Goose straight from the bottle, without the decency of hiding it in Gatorade or soda bottles. Guess there are no open container laws in downtown ATL. :)

So, I've never seen the ball drop in NY (which is sad) but watching the Peach drop makes up for it. I love this new pseudo-tradition of celebrating NYE elsewhere!
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More pictures from Piedmont Park. I was allowed to take this one. Even though no one is in it.
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S.A.D.

Today is Day 13 of cloudiness here in southeastern WI. The record is 14 days sans sunshine, and it was set in late Dec 1991 - Jan 1992. I haven't the foggiest (no pun intended) idea what to do with myself. My love of the Wisc is quickly waning. Life would be so much better if I lived somewhere with sunshine. *sniff.

Maybe I'm suffering from S.A.D.: Seasonal Affective Disorder. Essentially, this affects people who feel sad and depressed during the winter months. I think I should go get some light therapy.

Holiday....

Well, I have returned from the great ATL in one piece. Actually, I've been back since New Year's Day so I could attend the big, traditional, family dinner (albeit very very sleepy). I've been holding off on writing about it b/c I figured what's the use in writing the story if I can't post pictures? Am I right? Or am I right?

So, just sit tight friends, I'll be back to a highspeed connection in due time. For now, let's just say I had a fantastic time (wink).

You Make Me Laugh

Bill Bryson is hysterical. Absolutely nuts and therefore his writing made me LOL. Literally, I laughed out loud. I'm sure my neighbors upstairs think I am some kind of maniac since they've undoubtedly heard me laughing loudly and uncontrollably for the past couple nights -- but I think we can consider it even since they continue to train clydesdales up there. Anyway, allow me to post a teensy excerpt (or 2 or 3) from his book "I'm a Stranger Here Myself":

From a chapter on funny statistics:
" Consider this intriguin fact: Almost 50,000 people in the U.S. are injured each year by pencils, pens, and other desk accessories. How do they do it? I have spent many long hours seated at desks where I would have greeted almost any kind of injury as a welcome diversion, but never once have I come close to achieving actual bodily harm."

"But the people I would really like to meet are the 142,000 hapless souls who received emergency room treatment for injuries inflicted by their clothing. What can they be suffering from? Compound pajama fracture? Sweatpants hematoma? I am powerless to speculate.

From a chapter on taxes:
"Complete Sections 47-52 first, then proceed to even-numbered sections and complete in reverse order. Do NOT use this form if your total pensions and annuities disbursements were greater than your advanced earned income credits OR vice versa."

"If you have any questions about filing,, or require assistance with your return, phone 1-800-BUSY-SIGNAL. Thank you and have a prosperous 1999. Failure to do so may result in a fine of $125,000 and a long walk to the cooler."

I found the chapter on taxes especially funny having just completed Tax 1A. I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did, and I also hope you were not caught snickering inappropriately at your desk. If by chance you were, just read them the above passage, and I'll bet you'll get a raise. :)

Una Domanda

How do you tell your upstairs neighbor to please stop clydesdal-ing around at random hours when you've never actually spoken before?

This is hysterical

Courtesy of a fellow law student:

Should the Penis Get a Raise?

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following
Reasons:
* I do physical labor.
* I work at great depths.
* I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
* I do not get weekends or holidays off.
* I work in a damp environment.
* I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
* I work in high temperatures.
* My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
Sincerely, The Penis.

Dear Penis,
After assessing your request and considering the arguments you have
Raised, The administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
* You do not work eight hours straight.
* You fall asleep after brief work periods.
* You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
* You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.
* You do not take initiative.
* You need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
* You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
* You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
* You will retire well before you are 65.
* You are unable to work double shifts.
* You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.

And if that were not enough, you are constantly seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious looking bags.
Sincerely, The Management.

Life as a law student

Well, my life is not very exciting, and neither is any of my friends' at the moment. I would, however, like to say that it got all the way down to -2 degrees yesterday. *sniff

Hysterical

Every once in a while, someone says something to me that is so funny that I am still laughing at it several days later. The following is just such a line, enjoy!

"I have a perfect track record of never being a homewrecker, thankyouverymuch." says me.

"Yeah, but, I live in an apartment..." says my scandalous friend.

" ." my lack of response, because I'm laughing far too hard. What do you say to that anyway?

Inspired by my away message

I have a few questions:
1. why is there snow on the ground?
2. where are all the jobs hiding?
3. why is dieting unfun?
4. where can i find a pretty cuddlebuddy?

Answers would be greatly appreciated.

Confessions

Alright, I confess. I am a chronic under-eater. Not in the anorexic, eating disorder way. But in the 'my schedule got thrown off and so I haven't eaten for 5 hours' way. Which usually leads to headache or dizziness. ACTUALLY, that might not be true. I think my friends and family just say that because they know I get headaches often. I still maintain that there has been no proven connection between my headaches and my random eating habits.

But here's the problem. Say you haven't eaten anything all day -- but you did have a nice, warm, yummiful latte from the local coffee shop. You finally get around to eating something purchased at the mall or a nearby fast food place. So, say it's now quite late in the evening. What to do now? Do you eat something else that can be quickly bought? OR do you leave the eating for another day?

Yes, this was a random post. Yes I'm writing it simply to avoid studying. Blah.

D.C. at night.
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D.C. at night

I heart D.C. at night -- well, the monuments anyway. I'm sure the 'hood is nothing nice. But I have no intention of being in the 'hood at night, so I will stick with my original statement. I heart D.C. at night. And might I add, I feel that visiting the Jefferson Memorial at dusk would make for quite a romantic date -- I wonder if you can take a picnic out there? Hey neat! That's the second out-of-town romantic date I've discovered. (Remember my post about the Lou). Now all I need is the rich boyf who can afford to spring for the plane tickets and the hotel.

~I'll bet you'd be expected to put out for a date like that. Hmm, that's unfortunate because I'm not putting out for anything less than a carat.

Monogamy

I was just watching the "tyra" show (not on purpose, believe me that was just the channel the t.v. was on when I turned it on). For the 15 minutes that I tolerated the show, I realized that that was 15 minutes of my life that I won't get back. But aside from that, I heard something interesting. Hugh Hefner, playboy extraordinaire, was on talking about monogamy. (Apparently, the topic of the show was 'is monogamy natural?') Tyra asked him if he thought monogamy was natural, and you can guess his answer. But then she asked if his heart had ever been broken by someone cheating. And he said yes. More shocking, he said that he had been faithful to his second marriage. I was shocked! Now, of course, there's the possibility that he's lying, but that wouldn't really do much for his reputation one way or another. So, assuming we believe him, isn't that reassuring? If Hugh Hefner, playboy extraordinaire, who ALWAYS has (ahem) bunnies around can be faithful, then maybe so can the average man.

Neat. That's one chip away at the big block of cynicism on my shoulder. :)

Profound thoughts while in the shower

You know that commercial for a hotel chain that says "just think what would happen to you if you stayed here..." and they show people winning Nobel prizes wrapped in towels, or coming up with a brilliant business plan while wrapped in a towel, etc. Basically these people have been coming up with wonderful ideas because the showerheads at the hotel were so great that they stayed in there and had great ideas? Well, short story long; I love that commercial because it's very true to life (for me). I ALWAYS think in the shower. Today, said thought was something I decided to share.

I've always wondered what people really think about me. Have you ever wondered this? I mean, certain things you're completely aware of. Other things, those things people just won't tell you, I've always wanted to know. What are those unspeakable things that people say behind my back? I mean, the true things, of course. The untrue things generally get back to me eventually -- (did you hear I slept with so and so? I know! I wonder if it was good?) Basically, I've always wondered what I don't know about my personality. I've always thought most people are aware that I can handle it, but I know people always say that, but they don't really mean it. So, I guess until I find someone that is super rude in normalcy terms, I'll just never know. Sad times. Ah well. Ignorance is bliss right? And if not bliss, at least it's an excuse for not changing those bad habits right? (That's my version of reality anyway :})

Una Domanda

Why is the guy on "how do i look?" wearing a skirt? Please explain. Furthermore, why is the skirt he's wearing not the only one he owns? If you hazard a guess, please keep in mind that he is in a heterosexual relationship and says he wears them for comfort. And then he had the audacity to be surprised when his g/f said it was a problem in their relationship.

Note to the male public at large: wearing a skirt will not turn your woman on.
Thank you.

Adventures in Bureaucracy

My newest adventure in dealing with idiots happened early this week. On Monday, I applied for a private loan because frankly, law school is expensive. (Insert comment about me being in-state here. Good, glad you got that out of your system).

However, instead of granting the loan, I received an email from Uncle Stafford telling me that my financial aid was already equivalent to my need/expenses, and therefore my loan was denied. Well gee! Why didn't I think of that?! If my expenses were already paid, why did I apply for that silly loan? Oh right. Because I still need money, so apparently I still have expenses. Idiots!

Meanwhile, I still need that money, but it is unavailable to me. Now, grant it, I'm not working right now. But even if I was, what kind of part-time job leads to $3500 (quickly, no less). Yeah, I couldn't think of one either. I hate school.

Peaches & Cream

Yes, I have pictures of the D.C. trip, but they will have to be posted later. Today, I am making an announcement, for NYE I will be travelling south (ah, warmer weather) and having good times in the state of peaches. I was debating between Atlanta (pretty brown men) and Minnesota (awesome Phi-Os). In the end, after taking a poll, ATL won by a pretty tight margin. The deciding factor was that I spent NYE in Minnesota 2 years ago, and I've never spent it in ATL. Thus, I will be taking a trip south to visit an aforementioned engineer. Neat. :)

We're Herrre!

Each your heart out kids. I'm in the Nation's Capital baby!

Something Happened!

Yay! The Malpractice Bash happened. It was generally a good time. The med students definitely outnumbered the law students this year. Sadly, they were mostly lame and boring, but this was to be expected. The girls kept squealing though, and that was supremely annoying. The BLSA men were out in full force, and that is always wonderful to see. The 2L class, BLSA or otherwise, was shamefully MIA. The 1L class was there but quiet. And my class, well, we already knew most of us are lame, but those of us that love to party were definitely there. All in all, it was a good time. And to top it off, I managed to take a picture that made me look tall! Woo hoo!

The Winds of Change...

Are stagnant. Darn it. In spite of quoting Etta, I am, indubitably, in a rut. My mother once told me that if you're finding something wrong with the whole world, maybe you're the one with the problem. Yeah, I'm living that life. Everything is driving me crazy these days. Everyone I know is grating on my nerves; my apartment makes me stir-crazy; I've been feeling whiny (which drives me crazy, let alone people I talk to I'm sure) and I have wicked cravings for random food. So unless I am pregnant via immaculate conception, I need a change.

So what to do? I need a vacation, but I have no moola; I am the engineer on the broke-train. I do have a trip to D.C. coming up, but alas, it is for an interview. (Note: that is singular, not plural). But I would much prefer a vacation. Or perhaps a different sort of distraction. Like, winning the lottery. Or maybe a new toy -- like a new cell phone or the iPod Nano. Or maybe a new love-interest. Something, anything new! Living vicariously through my friends is proving fruitless. I need my own life, the novelty of this one is wearing off.

Now, about those cravings -- anybody got a line on peanut butter cupcakes?

Whoa

Ok, last night I'm talking with my friend, and we were discussing relationships. How we got on that topic is beyond me, but I choose to blame him for it. Because, I was talking about my last LTR (long-term relationship), and I realized that my last one was 4 years ago. Good heavens! Really?! It's been that long? Sad.

Now, of course I've gotten over not having an LTR. It's not like that was my last date. But, law school has been taking FOREVER, so it doesn't feel like that was 4 years ago....almost 5 now! eek! Can I just graduate from law school immediately, and then pause time. I'm really not ready for adulthood, thankyouverymuch. And for the record, I plan to be 24 for at least one more year.

Octoberfest

Halloween in Madison. The Midwest's answer to Mardi Gras, Vegas, and Carnivale. As usual, the MPD was out, several thousand strong with riot gear and pepper spray. This year, I managed to avoid the mayhem. I haven't seen the news yet, to find out how many people were arrested and whether there was a riot. But my guess would be that it was slightly calmer this year because the school didn't allow any guests in the dorms for the weekend, and they sent out letters to all the other UW schools uninviting the students. (Aren't we the hosts with the most?) I did take a trip down memory lane and play a rousing game of A**hole. Ahh, college years. It's good to be President. Anyway, Halloween was fun, as it has been every year. Pictures will be posted shortly.

Found Treasures

Have you ever found an old roll of film from goodness-knows-when and decided to develop it? Well I had that moment this past weekend, so I finished said roll of film at the Cane Toss at Homecoming. The pictures ranged from last Halloween, to last Malpractice Bash and other random moments in my life. I think I'll be posting some during my class today, as I'll need something to keep me awake :).

My Flamingo Friend

My flamingo friend has a veritable cornucopia of quizzes on her blog. So I decided to take one of them. Here are my results.


You will perish of fits. Repeat this to yourself:
"Things can work out even if I don't get
my way. Things can work out even...."

What horrible Edward Gorey Death will you die?
brought to you by some guy who's name wasn't finished.

A day in the life of...

Well, here's what's happening in my life:

1. I am fasting. I haven't eaten any solid foods since Sunday, and the fast isn't over until Friday at noon. Anyone who would like to join me at Olive Garden on Friday at 12:01 should contact me immediately. My Auntie says that I will be able to tell people how good God is at the end of the fast. And while I believe that wholeheartedly, I can honestly say right now, all I can tell people is how good some barbeque wold be right now.

2. I was fasting last week as well. Except last week, it was no meat and no media. Giving up meat wasn't so bad. Giving up secular music was also not so bad. Giving up t.v. was horrible! I'd even go so far as to say it was slightly worse than this week's fast. I am quite dependent on t.v. I don't know if that is very sad or just fact. But, there it is.

3. I will be attending a fraternity Black and Gold masquerade ball on Friday. I may have invited my ex (yes that one), and he may have accepted. But my invitation was conditional on my friend taking a date....I did NOT want to be the 3rd wheel. But if she doesn't take a date, and I can manage to uninvite the ex, then I might get to play with the adorable president of the fraternity. He's so young though, (and kinda skinny a la my last law school fling), so all play dates are required to be in public places a.k.a. at parties.

4. Yet another couple at the law school is engaged. That makes, what, a million? How is it all these people are getting engaged/married, and I can't even get a friggin' date?

5. The sexy engineer from Atlanta is going to be soooooooo very close to me tonight and tomorrow. He is flying into Chicago to interview in Rockford. Far far closer than Atlanta. But, sadly, he's only going to be in the vincinity for less than 24 hours. Not nearly enough time to get together. Which is just as well, since inevitably we'd want to go out to eat, and I can't eat. (See happening #1).

6. I am still wondering why the best relationship I have with the male persuasion is one with a man who is several hundred miles away. There have been all kinds of theories on this ranging from my tendancy to be like a dude, to my tendancy not to enjoy people. Either way, it is highly inconvenient that I don't have any distractions within driving range.

The end. Isn't my life exciting? Ok, so it's not. But at least you're updated!

Coming Home

You know, the nice thing about driving to Iowa these days? There isn't class at the end of the ride. In fact, it usually means I've escaped class and been wholly unproductive for a few days. I love homecoming. What a great excuse to party with people you haven't spoken to in forever, and get the newest gossip (my Phi-O mom is married?!!? WHAT!?), who's pregnant?! (ok no one, that was an exaggeration). Plus you get to see all the people that gained weight (HAHA BITCHES!) and all the people that look too fabulous for words (Darn them!). All in all, it was a great 24 hours.

OH! And I am also extremely happy to report that I met not only our founders, but also the newest m-te's. The Os are keeping it real and have increased the m-te members. Atta girls! Phi O D.Q. 4eva!

And then....

So, I thought yesterday was a good day....
And then, I accidentally slept in too late.
And then, I was 2 minutes late to Italian class.
And then, I forgot to take my meds at the normal time.
And then, the meds started messing with my head more than normal.
And then, I couldn't see a darn thing out of my contacts, because the prescription is wrong.
And then, (drumroll please)
.....
.....
.....

And then, a riding lawnmower ran into, and injured (and by injured, I mean cracked the body of) my scooter.

Sad.

My Undergrad Experience

A quote that just about sums it up....taken from a comedian on Bravo's "Great Things About Being"...

'would I date him? Date is such a big word; I'd probably french kiss him for the anecdote'.

Well said.

Getting worse, not better

The FFL continues, as will my dominance. Ok, I don't know that for sure, but I do know that I am getting more obsessed, not less. Tomorrow, magazine points are going to be posted. But instead of waiting, like a good little girl (I slept with one eye open on Dec 24 when I was little too), I start checking the magazines that I am in possession of to see which designers have big mentions. It looks like my points horse, Armani (Amo italiani!) stands to give me a gain of 100 points tomorrow. Ahh, what a great first round draft pick. Eat your heart out league members. I am Queen of the Fashionistas!

ha!

I am wont to admit it, but oddly enough, I am suddenly understanding the obsession with fantasy football.

Comin' for that #1 spot

It's official. I am the fashionista that everyone believes I am. I am currently in 1st place in the FFL. I RULE!

In other news, I have a horrible case of "hives". We don't know that they are hives, but anyway, I'm on a ton of meds. One of them, the pharmacist told me will give me mood swings and tummyaches. Awesome, it'll be like I'm on my period for 20 days.

In like Flynn

I found five other people who are just as excited (and geeky) as me. We are sooooooooo doing it. Keep an eye out for my team players:
Celebrities: Gwyneth Paltrow, Will Smith, Felicity Huffman
Celebrity Designer: Jennifer Lopez
Clothing Designers: Vera Wang, Prada, Giorgio Armani
Handbag Designer: Kate Spade
Jewelry Designer: Fred Leighton
Shoe Designer: Ferragamo

Oh, I am SOOOOOOO In!

So, I was watching the Today Show this morning, when they started talking about "Football Widows" and how women needed something to do while the menfolk were off watching football. I have to admit, I was more than a little insulted by this proposition. I am a woman, and adore football. But, I kept watching (I'm hostage to my ever-fussy reception). Apparently, some chick with far too much time on her hands has created a Fantasy Fashion League. Ahem, pardon?

Well, I looked at the website. You need 6 people to start a league. Then, each "team" selects 10 "players". The players are designers -- clothing, shoes, handbags -- and celebrities. Points are acquired through press releases, sightings, mentions in magazines, etc. The website keeps track of all the points for you, and then at the end there's a winner. Each winner will be entered into a drawing to win a $1000 shopping spree at the online shoe store, zappos. Well, needless to say, I was intrigued. I have since emailed all of my fashion savvy friends, and hopefully we will have a --shall we say, League of Our Own?!

The downside is that it costs $18, but happily $8 of each person's fee goes to Katrina aid. NICE!

FYI

Just so you know, if you choose to leave me happy posts, you will have to verify that you are a real human being. Just type the word as you see it, to prove that you aren't a robot. Thanks! Merci! Gracias! Obrigada! Grazie!

So, there I was, listening to Dick while taking a long swig of Naked Juice

This is the comment made about me while sitting in my Biz Trans class. I was hugely amused (as my friend says, I am easily amused) and so it has become the title of today's blog. I really don't have much to say, as I don't lead a very exciting life these days, but I would like to reflect on things I'm loving about life right now.

1. I have a MAJOR crush on a sexy engineer. He is uber-cute, uber-smart, and meets the height requirement. I enjoy dreaming of lazy days of cuddling. (Does this make me a hopeless romantic, or seriously hard-up?)

2. I have a mere 24 credits to complete in order to graduate. Do you realize just how leisurely my life will be this year?! Ahhhh, it feels good to reap the rewards of working my arse off last year.

3. I ADORE taking Italian. I haven't started my "self-study" of Portuguese. I look forward to the self-confusion that will ensue. But for now, I am super-pumped that I might actually crack my 5 languages goal.

That is all for now. Health, family, etc. notwithstanding. The one thing I lament is that no one is sending me flowers, but a girl can't have everything now can she? Ok, well she can, I just don't right now. It's cool....I bought myself flowers. So there. :P

Shh...Can you keep a secret?

I still miss him. I thought I was over him. But, apparently, I still miss him. Ah well, c'est la vie.

In other non-secret news, I have decided that I will take Italian for Romance Language Speakers. Portuguese conflicted with my schedule (grr) so I decided to take lemons and make lemonade. You may recall that I wanted to take Italian last year...but that didn't work out, hence Portuguese. This Italian course is terminal, so maybe next semester it will be back to Portuguese :)!

In even more news, I FINALLY finished my Thailand scrapbook AND my Hawaii scrapbooking. Japan is waiting in the wings. I'm shooting to finish it by tomorrow, but that may not actually happen. Who's excited to see it?!

Flashback

Last night, I witnessed one of the greatest flashback moments of all time. I was sitting in BW3s, watching (much to my embarrassment and chagrin) WWE Summer Slam. Although it was painful for most of the 2 hours I was there, I was rewarded with two very exciting occurrences. First, The Undertaker is still wrestling. He lost, but it was definitely a blast from the past. But, more importantly, the last twenty-six minutes were filled with bone chilling excitement....

The man himself, the man in red and yellow, came out of retirement for one last match. That's right, I watched Hulk Hogan wrestle in a post-retirement, result of trash-talking and former tag-team partner revenge, match. He wore the red and yellow feather boas, the tie-dyed red and yellow tights, AND the much loved Hulkamania bandana. In spite of the unbelievably bad acting, I was deeply enthralled. I watched that fight during all 26 teeth-gnashing, bone-clenching, white-knuckle minutes and it was fan-freakin'-tastic. I then called all my friends and relatives to tell them about it. Ok, not all of them, but everyone that I thought would be remotely amused by the event. I'm still reeling from the excitement of it all :).

Are you kidding?

Why did I get spam in my blogger comments? Have spammers really sunk this low? (see below comment).

If I have to tell you what this is, we should rethink our citizenship.
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Changing of the Guard at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. Notice how it looks much like the changing of the guard in Bangkok.
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...And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you...but what you can do for your country. This is a picture from the JFK memorial in Arlington Cemetary.
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Lincoln Memorial as seen from the WWII Monument.
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Sir Lincoln, please meet my blog readers :).
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The Washington Monument in all its glory.
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Hot, hot, hot

Last I checked, I was visiting the nation's capital, not the tropics. Why is it so blinkin' hot?!

Anyway, my first night in town, some of us walked down to the Lincoln Memorial and saw the Washington Monument and the WWII Memorial. They were quite historic :). I also noticed that there were urns, lights, and "quiet please" signs all around. I mused to myself that this was interesting. Whereas other cultures have temples of religion, we have temples of democracy....and that's ok with me. (I happen to enjoy that whole, "liberty and justice for all" theme. Even if it is mostly theory rather than practice :P).

The Arch, at dusk..."Gateway to the West"...and new fave romantic weekend getaway of mine. :)
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This is the old courthouse in St. Louis....and where the infamous Dredd Scott case was decided.
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Sometimes a HotShot just shows up on your camera. This was taken at the top of the Arch.
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HA and might I add HA!

Please see the post entitled "A little bit of bubbly and standardized testing". And then you too will be endlessly entertained. A word of caution: if you're at work, you will be caught snickering inappropriately.

Meanwhile, I was planning on posting my romantic pictures of St. Louis without my romantic partner. However, I forgot such necessary essentials as the camera and the USB cable. I don't like to quibble with such details.