Oooh, That's Deep

So today, at the weekly Cashmere Mafia meeting, we were counseling a member on how she should not not NOT feel bad about this guy who was a total prick. We were discussing the two modes of thinking. Some of us were on her side, namely that you feel that you have a duty to tell these dues why, exactly, they are so blinkin' bogus. The other faction believes once you screw up, we check out and you're done.

Personally, I fall into the former category. I feel it is my duty, and my privilege, to tell a guy why you are so blinkin' bogus. And that got me to thinking. Maybe that's the real reason why the engineer got an invitation to Chicago...and made it back on the island, for that matter. I attempted to be a member of the latter category. He screwed up HUGELY. But I never took the chance to tell him how badly he screwed up. Instead, he screwed up, I walked away. But, I obsessed for 18 months about how much he sucked...and how dare he treat me that way. Now, I'm given the chance to tell him, and I find myself dragging my feet. I've fallen back into "the way we were." This, is bad. The desire to tell someone about themselves is not a good reason to allow them back on the island.

But, after extending the invitation, can you really shut it down? And, if my feelings were originally that strong, should I turn my back on it? Ooooh, that is sooo deep.

Back to Olympus

At the risk of sounding like a terrorist, are the Olympics still on?!!? Seriously!! I can't believe how long the Olympics have been interrupting regular programming. I feel like it's been on for months and months and months. Even when I was little, the only sports I really cared about were gymnastics and the sprinting events of track & field. Now that I have an obscenely early bedtime, I can't even watch those events since they're almost always shown live. So, I respectfully request that in 2012, they put the Olympics on one of those nifty digital stations, and I'll go ahead and tune in when I feel like it. I know you can do it!

Avoidance is not Closure

So, I bet you're all wondering how the weekend with the Engineer was. Well, it was great! Lots of fun doing tons of stuff. I started it off with a bang, by taking him to the Signature Lounge on the 96th Floor of the John Hancock. The view up there is awesome, by the way. Then, the next 3 days were as filled with as much as I could find to do, with the exception of Monday, when I was put on house arrest by the Engineer since I was deathly sick with the Plague.

Anyway, the sad part about the weekend is that I failed to actually address the elephants in the room. Namely, how super bogus he was a year and a half ago (longer now). And second, what this trip will lead to for the future. Contrary to popular belief, I have a rational reason for not really pushing the conversation. Shortly after his arrival, I realized that I could either treat this weekend like a fun summer fling; or, I could address all of the aforementioned issues and add some unnecessary tension to the weekend. I chose to go with option a. Reason being, he just bought a condo out west. I have less than zero intentions of moving out there. And by virtue of purchasing a condo, he has essentially made the statement that he's not moving here. So, in the end, why bother pressing the issue?

Now, I have friends (SiQ, 2DP) who are opposed to the Engineer generally. And friends who, after grudgingly accepting the visit, will be opposed to the fact that I pressed no issues (SiQ, Kaia). Sooo, what we've learned is, I am completely defiant in the face of the island cabinet.

At any rate, that's all I got for ya, without giving you a detailed schedule. And that would not make for such an interesting blog. Anyway, I thought that the results would be far more interesting. All in all, a great summer fling weekend.

A Quickie Post

My psychic powers can sometimes be very gratifying. And sometimes quite upsetting. Today, I think they fall into the upsetting category. In my last post, I ended it with the dire premonition that there was the possibility that I would not hear back from my Blair Underwood. Funny, I did hear back from him, but it was only via text, and it was on Friday. "Hey pretty lady. How's your day going?" Or some such thing. Which would be totally sweet and adorable had it not been the only non-responsive communication. In other words, he responded to my email about the storm (we just had a giant one here on Tues), but didn't bother to call otherwise. Frankly, I'm incredibly confused. I mean, after a 7 hour date, don't you call? Or, ask for another date? Am I being blown off? And if so, can I get an explanation?

Grant it, after 1 date, I don't necessarily deserve an explanation. But it'd be nice to have one. Of course, part of me assumes this is the universe's way of getting back at me for the way I abruptly ended it with J.R. (the short old guy). But, on the other hand, at least I gave him an explanation.

In other news, while I'd totally prefer to go out with him again (especially given the total amnesia he gave me with regard to the Engineer), I can't say that I'm entirely that pressed. Yes, I would totally heart going out with him again. Yes, he is uber hot. No, I'm not planning to cry over it. In fact, I was on the eL today, calculating how much time I should let pass before deleting his number, when I realized I really could just delete it now. The unfortunate part is that if he were to call or text again, I'd likely not have a clue who he was, because unlike Snowflake, I didn't memorize his number by default.

D'ah well. As someone told me, it might be just as well. With the imminent arrival of the Engineer, perhaps now is not the best time to become totally smitten with Blair Underwood. On the other hand, Blair Underwood's masterful first date lifted my haze with regards to the Engineer's shenanigans, and helped me cool my original nonsense. This trip, though allegedly filled with potential, has been relegated to summer fling. I mean really? Can I truly get smitten with a guy who a.) cannot use a post office and b.) ticked me off to the point of speechlessness? I should send Blair Underwood a thank-you text for that. Too bad I refuse to set a precedent of always contacting him first.

My Blair Underwood

Did you ever notice that sexy Blair Underwood is often playing a character that seems so great on paper, but in the end the girl picks a significantly less awesome guy? Well, I'm wondering if perhaps I met my own personal Blair Underwood.

As you all know, I went out on a date on Saturday. It was a fantastic date. We went to see Too White Crew and then we went to eat Indian food at a fantastic little restaurant near my apartment. After dinner, which was filled with tons of lively conversation, he walked me back to my apartment. My original intent was to take my food out of our shared to-go bag, and then see him on his way. Well, we ended up sitting on my incredibly comfy couch, and engaging in more lively discussion. Then, we eventually fell into comfortable, cuddly quiet. And then, it was 7 hours after our date started. So, I drove him home (with regrets).

But now, as I look back, I'm not as excited as I should be. Most likely it's because he told me that he just got out of a 4 year relationship. Ahem, 2 months ago! Gah! I'm pretty sure I've been relegated to the rebound of the closest thing to perfect guy. Bummer. We'll see how it goes though, because I'm all over the 2nd date. That is, if he ever bothers to ask. :\

Maneater

I've decided go bring out the player card for the weekend. As usual, it happened unintentionally. But I'm in a go-with-the-flow kinda mood, so I figured what the heck.

Recently, there was a surprise re-emergence of Snowflake. Remember him? He left the island in favor of his ex-girlfriend's island. Evidently, the grass wasn't greener on the new island. (That's a hilarious statement because he actually said that.) Anyway, here's how it went down. On Monday, I got a text from Snowflake saying that he was in my 'hood and wanted to see what was shakin'. So I told him nada mucho other than the visit by a former rebound guy. (Didn't omit that, it just wasn't an exciting story.) So, while waiting for the rebound and his gf to arrive, Snowflake invited himself over to my place. I invited him out, but he politely declined. (He said he declined because he didn't want to have the rebound sizing me up. I suspect it was actually because he didn't want to look like he was on a date in spite of his gf; you know, the one that lives in Indy?)

Anyway, on his way out the door, he said that if I have any other concerts I need a backup for, he was down. As it turns out, I did have a concert at my fave bar coming up. (It's so awesome to have connections.) So, we're going out on Friday. Yes, that's the day before the date with the frat. Niiiiiiiiiiiice.

AND, there's my newly acquired skill of getting me and my girls into various clubs and bars without a cover. At this point, I'm even starting to impress myself. I guess it's a gift. :)

3 Votes against

That's what I hate about the SiQ. She never expresses her opinion. NOT. Ok, so the SiQ has voiced her vote and veto for the upcoming visit from a certain engineer. Sad to say, she is not alone. The Ex has voted against, and 2dp has voted against. Basically, everyone who has been my friend for the longest has voted against. What does this tell us?

Well, it tells us that I am capable of going against the peanut gallery. It also tells us that the peanut gallery often gives votes without being asked. And it tells us that I'm going to have a rather interesting weekend. Let's just hope it doesn't end in I told you so's.

In other news, there is a potential challenger on the island. He was invited onto the island last Saturday at a frat barbecue. He will henceforth be known as "Frat." At any rate, he has so far proven to be smart (book and street), handsome (goes without saying), and a total smart aleck. Also, he appears to be nice and also funny. I'll keep you posted.

Claiming the victory

I would like to make an announcement. I have found a job that I think will be perfect for me with a corporation that I think I would enjoy looking for. A wonderful lady that I met a couple months ago reviewed my resume for me, to help make myself more marketable. I have made all kinds of calls to get an "in". And now, I've applied. All I need now, is the job. Let's just go ahead and add that to the prayer circle, shall we? Thanks.

In other news, I have a teeny-tiny-itsy-bitsy announcement to make. A certain engineer may or may not be coming to visit. And he may or may not be arriving in 3 weeks. And that may or may not have been against the veto of one SiQ. But, in spite of the veto, I'm pretty pumped up about it.
Good times!

The Dog ate my Blog

OK OK OK. Quit hounding me! (Pun totally intended). I have been MIA for quite some time. But really? Not all that much has happened. (Total lie). But I'd been all kinds of slacking because I was fairly certain that no one was reading. And then I got scolded (twice). So here we are, back to blogging.

So here is my re-inaugural witty observation for the day. Commonwealth Edison must be out of its corporate mind. OR hugely into subtle irony. ComEd, like other companies, is attempting to go green, and prove its green-ess through various advertisements about town. And I am completely on board with that. Especially if a company actually follows through with its green promises.

But what I saw from the train the other day was pure comedy. ComEd has been putting up signs and billboards around town to advertise how to save electricity. Yes, awesome, I totally support that. BUT, one of the billboards was...wait for it...backlit! HA. You put up a lit-up billboard touting all of the great ways to save on electricity in order to save the Earth. Thereby wasting a ton of unnecessary energy. AWESOME. HA!

Black Flight

Quick question. Has anyone else noticed that all of the black characters are leaving network television? Can anyone tell me why? First, Jesse Martin from L&O (the original). Then the cutie mixed guy from one of the CSI shows. And Khandi Alexander from CSI: Miami. And wasn't the black guy from Lost killed off? Did I miss a memo? Is there a mission to methodically homogenize network television? Or are white people just more commercially viable? Don't answer that. I think I already know the answer.

Shame on you girlie

Ok. I am officially going on record as being a part of the problem in terms of the women's movement. Today, I was told that martamack's partners had my res, but had yet to do anything about it. Then he told me that one of them thought I was more than average looking. (Seriously, it wasn't in those words, but the way he put it I sounded like something this side of a girl next door). Anyway, so I decided to do some mathematics in my head. I'm heading to court tomorrow, in front of aforementioned partners who are currently interviewing, and I made the absolutely CONSCIOUS decision to wear a skirt suit rather than a pants suit tomorrow. Seriously. I'm actually going to play the womanly wiles card. Whether I'm successful or unsuccessful I have no idea. But the point is, I actually considered it fair game to try it. Yeah, I know. Shameful. And yet, I am totally and completely unapologetic about it.

News and Updates

Bet you're wondering how my date went with Marshall, my top secret date with my co-worker's son. Well, here it is.

We met up for drinks near downtown. But for the fact that he's got 2 girls and 2 kids, it would've been a high quality date. Conversation was not bad. While I was able to shock him, he was not so bad at keeping up with my snarky comments. Sadly, my good times plan of dropping my knowledge bomb was thwarted...he already knew that I knew.

But, alas, he has reached the upper echelon of player-status. Despite the fact that he knew that I knew about the two girlfriends and the ex-wife, he still treated it like a closed sale on a 2nd date. It was a flat out date for him, and he was darn confident that he'd get another one. In fact, he has officially taken the crown of the most arrogant person I know.

As we all know, pheebee enjoys a bold guy. Making the decision on granting another date completely conflicting. I enjoyed the date on a superficial level, but I really am not interested in becoming girl Tuesday, aka girl #3 -- that we know of.

My friend has a theory that the reason I kinda like the idea of going out with Marshall again is knowing that I have absolutely no responsibility to try and make it work with him. Nor do I have to actually see him all that often. I'm starting to sense a theme with all of my friends. Ah well!

Sad and Exasperated

As the It Girl, I was awarded a fabulous gift certificate for a pricey romantic dinner at a local restaurant. The certificate expires in 18 days. I have to find a love interest in 18 days. This, my friends, is what sucks about my life. I have no one to take to this dinner. Wait, let me rephrase. I have a variety of friends who would be willing to go. SiQ may be in town by then, and Kaia is always down to go out. But, I tire of constantly taking women where I should be taking men. Just once, I'd like to have a nice boy to do things with.

Sure, I asked Snowflake. But he, not surprisingly, has flaked. Actually, he has permanently flaked. As it turns out, he's come to the conclusion that he's not getting any from me (some people are slower than others). So, he's pretty much stopped returning my phone calls, and mostly blowing me off. Believe it or not, I'm less bothered by that than the fact that I can't invite him to places as a backup date.

And, there's always the Ninja, but as he's ticked me off for the for real, honestly, no more pretend, actually and truly last time, I can't ask him. And there's the guy who is aiding me raise my sketchiness quotient. I could take him, but he wouldn't properly appreciate it. AND, I'm positive he would read more into it than the intent. And, before you ask, yes I asked the soon to be only a mere visitor on the island, IM Boyf. And he said he'd go. But I don't think he'll make it to the Chi before the expiration date.

So what have we learned? I do not get the playette of the year award after all.

America's Pasttime

Is there a more loathsome mainstream professional sport on the planet than baseball? I defy you to find one. The sport has no redeeming quality at all. I've never liked baseball, but living in the Chi has turned my simple dislike into all out hate. I've spent the past 10 minutes watching the bottom of the 9th. For the past 10 minutes, the same dude has been at bat. He's hit at least 34 fouls, AND the count was full. In other words, I'm pretty sure the pitcher threw to this guy at least 90 times. That doesn't include the tosses to first base in attempt to keep the guy on first base from stealing second. That's 10 minutes of my life that I will never EVER get back.

And then, on top of all that, the players aren't even pretty to look at. For the most part, they are unattractive and overweight. Please give me one good reason to watch this sport. I beg of you. If I can't appreciate the "action" (and I use that term loosely); and I can't drool over the pretty boys, then why am I watching? This is the part where I remind myself that I have the power to change the channel. *Phew*.

Genius Award of the Day

Yesterday, I got the genius award of the day. Why you ask? Because I am a genius!

Yesterday I had to drive to an arbitration to lay some smack down. After laying the smack down, I (unfortunately) had to go back to the office. Lucky me, the parking structure wasn't full! Hooray! So, off I pull into the parking structure and secure a spot. I turn off the car, throw my keys in my purse, open the door, and hit the automatic lock. And then I think to myself, "hmm...that's odd. I never do that. But I guess it's ok, I specifically remember putting the car keys in my purse. It would suck to lock my keys in the car, but I know I'll have my purse with me." (I'm not exaggerating, I literally thought that because I have a special paranoia about locking my keys in my car).

Anyway, I get out of the car and take out the shoes I'm going to walk to the office in. For the record, I totally deserve what I get because I was only changing shoes so that I could wear my Charles David black-patent-leather stilettos to lunch with Martamack. Anyway, as I'm changing into my tennis shoes, I hear the door slam behind me. (Insert expletive here). Then I think to myself, "maybe I left the window open." Followed by "I never leave my windows down." I walk over to the other side of the car, and of course, the window is secured and up. (Insert expletive here.)

How did I get into my car after all? Well, I am quite resourceful, that's how! And by resourceful, I mean that I called Martamack and begged him to help. Thank goodness he had his car in the city. (Sadly, he's going to hold this over my head for months, I can feel it.) And then the adventure began. I spent my lunch hour going to Kaia's new job in Wrigleyville. Then I went to Kaia's apartment to get my spare apartment keys out of her purse. (Getting a wee bit lost on the way). Then I took her apartment keys back to her at her job. Then we went to my apartment to get my spare car keys. Nearly 90 minutes later I'm back at my car, getting out my bags, leaving the shoes, and going back to the office. At this point, all I've had to eat is an apple. So I stop at CVS for a quick Lean Cuisine, and see my boss standing in line. (Blast!) So I boldly walk up to him and tell him the story; at which point he promptly calls me a knucklehead. (Good, he doesn't seem to blame me, or notice that I was gone for 90 minutes). And that's how I got the genius award of the day.

Sketchy McSketcherson

Duuuuude. I've upped the sketchy quotient a notch. Here's what happened:

So, my co-worker has a son who is pretty attractive. But he's also out of my age range, and has 2 kids, and is recently divorced. None of this really mattered though, because the odds of me ever meeting him were slim to none. So really, the only reason to ever discuss him was to laugh at his antics with his 2 girlfriends. Oh, and I told my co-worker to set me up with him so that he could take me on a cruise the way he did one of his girlfriends late last year. (The reason this was funny is because a bunch of family members went, and the girlfriend was mostly a whiny wet blanket. I told my co-worker that if they took me, I'd be loads of fun, and really wouldn't care what he did or with whom. Basically I just wanted the free trip -- you know me!)

So, all of that background for this: He stopped by the office because he was in the neighborhood. And my co-worker brought him around to meet all of us. So when they got to my office, I asked her if she'd told him about the cruise plan. She hadn't, so we told him then and there. After he walked away, I arrogantly said to myself "bet he asks her for my phone number -- or comes back and asks me." (Yeah, I can't believe my arrogance either!) But get this, later that night, I definitely got an email from him telling me to call him. (Unbelievable, right?).

I email him back, and tell him that I'll get back to him in a couple days. He slips it in the next email that he didn't tell his mom that he'd emailed me. Which honestly is fine with me because this is seriously not going anywhere. And it'd be wicked awkward to tell her I'm dating her son. (Yikes). Anyway, I never called. I figured why bother. I don't do so well with players, kids, or the older gentleman.

But here's the shocking part. He actually called me! Just the other day, which is roughly a week later. I never would have thought he'd call. I mean for one, I said I'd call him and didn't. And for two, based on what his mom says, he's quite the player. Since when do player's put forth so much effort? Anyway, he was quite bold and asked me when we were going out for lunch. I was quite sassy (because that's what players drive me to be). So now I have to be all secretive about my upcoming lunch date. (That means you too readers! Keep your collective yappers shut!)

Short story long, we're going to lunch. And I've officially raised my sketchiness quotient. Aye pheebee!

Horoscope

According to my horoscope, I'm commitment-shy. I would like to categorically disagree with this. I enjoy the idea of commitment greatly. I like the idea of having someone to spend an entire day in bed with. Of course, maybe that's just because I enjoy cuddling, and thus far have been unable to find a pet that I can cuddle with without risking asthma. Shout out to Gigi! But, what I don't particularly relish is the idea of committing myself who isn't the GREATEST. BOYFRIEND. EVER.

According to my ex, the Ninja, I want someone who's perfect. Well excuse me, it's not that he has to be perfect. He just has to be perfect for me. I'm not entirely clear on why that's too much to ask for. But that really does explain why we're soooooooooo NOT getting back together.

This does leave me to wonder where aforementioned greatest boyfriend ever might be found. I can pretty much guarantee that he's not making it very easy to find him. Hmm...maybe people (and my horoscope) think I have a commitment problem because I'm not so diligent in my search? D'ah well. Just add it to my list of things to do.

Score, Schmore

This is the gist of Brother's theory on my ACT score. The conversation went like this:

MMM: So you got a what on your ACT?
pheebee: A such and such.
MMM: And you got a full ride to law school?
pheebee: Yes.
MMM: At that pretty good law school?
pheebee: Yes.
MMM: Ok, either those scores and scholarships are not tied in the least to intelligence...OR you are the biggest. liar. EVER.

He was referring to my somewhat questionable actions when it comes to my love life (or lack thereof). I don't think it's fair to make that assumption. I mean intellect, I'm all over that...often. But, love life? PAH! I have little to no experience.

On the other hand, maybe it's just MMM being wrong as usual. Later on in the conversation, he told me I was going to be single and alone forever. Nice isn't he?

Silencing the Peanut Gallery

Yeah right. That title is really in reference to wishful thinking...sort of. I enjoy the peanut gallery. But lately, the peanut gallery has been yammering about IM Boyf. For some reason, they've knighted him the one with Potential. I have no idea why. I mean really? He lives in St. Louis and has distinctly expressed his general aversion to relationships.

And, evidently, I also have an aversion to relationships. Is it weird that I use my friends and road-dogs as one of my many many many valid reasons not to get into a serious relationship? I mean, really...I feel about 1000 times more useful as a single friend. I think it stems from the time when I was the only "singleton" around, and all of my (in-town) friends were in LTRs. I had no one to play with on the weekends. Add to that the fact that it was wintertime and it made for a lonely stretch. Grant it, I probably wasn't going out due to my general avoidance of precipitation; but I would feel extremely guilty if any one of my friends were in that position.

Now's the part where I acknowledge that not one of my friends has ever EVER laid said burden at my doorstep. And frankly, I don't think any of them would reciprocate -- nor would I ever ask them to. I mean really, what kind of selfish beast would ask that? And, if one of my friends had the audacity to ask or imply that, I'd probably tell them about themselves (and they wouldn't like it). But, at the moment, that's my current reason for avoiding relationships. And it's working quite well thank you.

Actually, it's a fall-back reason. There's always the lack-of-opportunity reason. But if you ask the SiQ (which, no one did), she would say that the reason I have no opportunities is because I turn them all away due to aforementioned reason. But really? Even if she (or any other member of the peanut gallery) destroys that reason, I've got a million others. So bring it on ditches!

Playette's Handbook

In an effort to distract myself from Gigi, and because my dating habits are cyclical, I have been out a few times in the past few weeks. Four times in the past 2 weeks to be exact. First, there was IM Boyf for the Jill Scott concert in St. Louis. If I may? Wow. I was thoroughly and completely impressed. From the sports car to the decent seats, to having to pay for nothing but my train ride down, Mr. IM Boyf pulled out all the stops. And he framed it so that I was completely off-guard -- I thought I was a back-up date.

Second, I had tix to the John Legend Concert. It was by invitation or win only. I originally invited the Ninja, in an attempt to give him a 2nd chance. But, as per usual, he flaked. This time, he even waited until the last minute. So, I spent the next 2 hours finding someone else to go with. I called Snowflake and TinyTot. Both were available. So, I had to blow off TinyTot, and pacify him with a Friday date...and take Snowflake because I asked him first. That, and John Legend is a little deep for a first date. Anyway, Snowflake not only showed up, but also was quite a date. All in all, I'd say it was an excellent date.

The next day was Friday. I planned to meet TinyTot for First Fridays at the Museum of Contemporary Art. But, before I could go, the Danka guy asked if I wanted to grab a drink. My answer, of course, was heck yeah. Unfortunately, the Danka guy bought be two beverages prior to meeting with TinyTot; so I had to play sober with TinyTot. The Danka guy is over a decade older than me, so it wasn't a real date. TinyTot was. And I'd say the first date with TinyTot was quite good.

So, do any of these have potential? I have no idea. I'm not ready to place any bets yet. As long as I'm in the middle of the cycle, I may as well enjoy it and go with the flow. If for no other reason than the story...and we all know I'm always in it for the story. :)