Letters of Request, and the Response

To: The Board
From: pheebee
Re: Signage

Dear Distinguished Members of the Board,

I respectfully request the immediate removal of the sign which
says "fb enjoys the company of older men". This statement
is patently untrue. Furthermore the creepy old men of Matteson, IL
continue to pester me. I am not safe at the gym or at the gas
station. Please remove and destroy this sign.

Very Truly Yours,
Ms. "I only go for men my age"

To: pheebee
From: The Board
Re: Signage Removal Request

Dear Ms. "I only go for men my age,"

We have respectfully considered your request on this matter, and have
agreed to grant it. However, please note that the creepy old men of
Matteson, IL, as well as the rest of the world have informed the Board
that despite signage removal, they will nonetheless persist in their
harassing of young girls. Provided below is an excerpt of said letter:

"Harassment of young women is integral to our identity as creepy old
men. Furthermore, as many men suffer from delusions stemming from middle
age hormonal fluctuations, many are unable to grasp or appreciate that
their advances are patently unwelcomed. We sincerely hope that you may
understand our position on this matter, and as such reduce your pepper
spraying of our members."


Very Truly Yours,
The Board

This is highly disappointing. It's a day since I"ve received this response from the Board, and a mere few minutes ago I was accosted by yet another old man!! Somebody get me some pepper spray!!!!!!